Saturday, August 20, 2011

Old-Married-Couple-Dom

How do you know that the honeymoon period is well and truly over, and there is no return from the land of old married couples?

Here are three hints, fresh from personal experience tonight:

1. When on a Saturday night you, the hubby and kid get ready to go out. To do your grocery shopping at Pak'nSave.

2. As you are getting dressed (old married people tend to forget to get dressed while wandering out their old married home), your hubby looks at your much-loved trackpants and says "You know who you kind of look like? Sporty Spice."

Excuuuuuse me? First of all, honey, Mel Chisholm stopped calling herself "Sporty Spice" only...what, ten years ago? And secondly, Sporty Spice? Really? Not even Ginger? Or (gulp) Scary? No, I was Sporty Spice, the most unsexy of them all. To make it worse, I'm not even sporty, I just like trackpants because they're comfortable. Tragic!

3. While navigating the maze of aisles that is Pak'nSave, your husband looks at your trackpants in horror and asks what those white handprints are all over your butt, like mine did.

It's ok, I assured him. As I was testing the icing sugar pack for holes, it kind of exploded and I got sugar all over my hands. Then I had to crawl under the lowest shelf to get another one and the sugar marks were from me dusting myself off after.

He still looked confused...how could I be ok with walking around in public knowing there were white marks all over my pants, and specifically in the shape of handprints smack on my behind?

He summed it up quite well, the old hubby of mine: How times have changed.


Imagine this chick with a rugby jersey, brown skin and an extra 40kgs.
Apparently that's me.


4 comments:

Lani Wendt Young said...

I think Sporty Spice was the bad-dest, hot-test, prettiest Spice Girl of all....what a honey husband you have comparing her to you!

And dont lie - those white icing hand prints on your ass were from him grabbing you every so often while you were meandering down the PaknSave aisle. I can see it now, you two were just like those palagi lovey dovey couples who hold hands when they do their faakau and stop to kiss next to the vegetables (making me roll my eyes and gag, thinking 'oh go get a room already' because Im sooo chealous...)
Woohoo, Go Bina, the still-hot, still-got it married couple.

kuaback said...

hahaha..i was gonna say the same thing as sleepless..Don't like Rock Fob..you know those handprints are from your boo...

and you know the honeymoon phase is over when all you worry about is BILLS BILLS BILLS...or maybe that's just ME..bummer..

Sina Tupou said...

Oh stop your hateration on my icing sugar groped trackpants!! Lol! Maybe that's why the hubby was so horrified...which icing sugar buyer has been groping my wife in Aisle 3??

Those lovey dovey couples you speak of are only found in the vegetable section, next to the fancy cheese area, and the organic biodegradable 100% recycled toilet paper section. So I hear...never been near those sections. Actually, those probably don't exist at PaknSave...

Lani Wendt Young said...

Hmmm so you think if I take my Hot Man to the 100% recycled organic toilet paper section he will be overcome with an insane urge to grab my butt? And maybe kiss passionately enough that we will get asked to leave the store before they call security?

*thinking how i can con the HM into meandering down the organic/super expensive/only for cultured artistic refined people aisles...*